Monday, March 18, 2013

Spring Fever

Today I'm simply going to ramble.  That's it.  If you don't want to read the idle ramblings of a 30-something, then don't read it.  That's it.  I'm telling you, you probably aren't going to be interested.


Now, for the rest of which, I mean, me, and maybe some random stalker I have out there, I have Spring Fever.

In fact, I think it's worse than that, I have an actual fever, but that's probably due to the cold that my husband gave me and the drastic weather changes that we keep getting every week here in the wonderful Buckeye state.  Don't get me wrong, I really like this state.  I moved down here from 'ye ol' state up north" that's shaped like a mitten, and if that state were in the same condition job wise and such I'd love to be there.  I miss the green.  No, I don't miss the ever present cold that is usually there, but I do miss being in my Mom's backyard where there's actual trees and stuff.  Mind you there's trees here, but only if I plant them.  Up there they seem to just appear wherever you look.

Anyway, I did say I was going to ramble, didn't I?  I miss the sunshine and it actually being warm enough to be out in it.  And I miss planting things and I haven't even had the motivation to start seedlings this year because I just haven't felt up to it.  I've been sick three times this winter so far, four if you count the bladder infection that keeps popping up from time to time.  That's my own fault, I don't drink enough actual water.

Who does nowadays anyway?  I have a friend who doesn't drink soda.  He's skinny.  I'd like to be skinny.  I'm addicted to Coca-Cola.  I'm sorry.  Blame my father.  I like coffee too.  Blame my mother.  I don't think either of them will care, I don't blame them exactly, I know it's happening and don't do anything to stop it.

The problem with this feeling of lethargy and spring fever is that I just feel depressed.  I go to work and I want to do stuff.  There's LOTS to do.  I have time to do it and I should have the motivation, but then I look outside, and think about how tired I am, and I just want to go home.  It's not work's fault, it's my own depression seeping in and the fact that I don't feel like I'm putting my best foot forward.  I know how I feel when I'm up to snuff, and especially this week, I have not felt that way.

I'm not going to complain today about my lack of friends.  I have friends.  I'm not going to say that I want to hang out with people more because, well, I've been hanging out with people at least once a week for the last month (except maybe this week since we were all sick) so it's been a nice change of pace.  What I will complain about is that I never give myself enough time to get caught up on everything I'm supposed to be doing, or would like to be doing.  I make time for my husband, for my pets, for chores, for work, for reading , blogs, videogames and friends, but not for things I have on my back burner.  I have things to do for the convention I help run and except for a brief spell two days ago, I really haven't touched anything to do with that, and I know there's lots I should be doing.

So...there.  There's my ramblings.  My husband just came home from work so I suppose I will say hi to him and post this!